Thanks to everyone for hanging in with us as we have endured yet more computer issues.
As we have discussed the purpose for marriage and what God desires for us in our marriage...we have learned that God doesn't want us to settle or have a mediocre marriage. That wasn't His design. He wants our marriage to be fulfilling...He stated it when He created the first couple. "The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18)
Are you muddling through in your marriage? Are you bored with each other? Are you two people just coexisting together? That does not sound like fun! If you got married to enjoy the company of your spouse, how do you let that slip away? It might sound difficult after trying times or after a lack of a connection, but it isn't impossible! Too many people are willing to let their marriages become defeated and not do anything to fight for its life.
Marriage is the only earthly relationship that can parallel Christ's love for the church. In fact, husbands are given a very specific command regarding this. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." (Ephesians 5:25) Christ loved the church so much that he DIED for it! When we got married, we promised our spouse that we would stick with them through the good and the bad, sickness and in health, better or worse... when do we give up on the fact that we would give our lives for one another?
You might say "I do love my wife." "I do love my husband." But, your actions don't reveal this kind of sacrifical love for one another. Jesus demanded that if you love him, that it had to be demonstrated! (John 21:14-16) Does a husband or wife not have the same ability to demand that if you love one another, that it be shown?
We have seen too many couples who have struggled to hold their marriages together. Their marriages have been dealt the "death blow," but they continue to "try to make it work." They stay together because of God's feelings on divorce (Matt. 5:32), but fail to rebuild their marriages. They stay together because they have children, but fail to be more than coparents. How is this pleasing to your spouse, or more importantly, pleasing to God?
The Bible is full of commandments from God on His expectations for Christian living. Marriage is included in that. "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." (Eph. 5:33) God says if we love Him, we must keep His commandments. (John 14:15) We cannot be demonstrating love and glory to God, if we aren't demonstrating it in our marriages. God will hold us responsible for our actions and reverence towards His commands on Judgment Day.
We have learned that we don't want our marriage and our lack of respect/love for one another to be the reason we don't get to go to heaven. We want to go there more than anything and we also want to be there together. If God wants us to keep His commandments, then that includes our marriage. If we don't want to settle, then we shouldn't expect God to either.
